When I opened the back door, there was a
TREMENDOUS smell of gas, I went racing into the
basement and discovered that all of the clothes my
father had been hanging on the gaspipe caused the pipe to be pulled
off the ceiling, and gas was spewing out of the 1.5" pipe and had completely filled the house. I mean you could hear the
fwooshing sound of the gas, I ran up to one of the
empty apartments and immediately called PSEG and
told them I had a major leak/emergency, and then I went back into the basement to see where the gas was coming from, the pipe was
all entangled with clothes laying all over the floor,
behind an unused stove.
located where a
valve on the pipe had been broken off when the pipe came down,
I stuck the valve back into the slot and at least stemmed the gas, then
I raced all over opening windows, and oh, about 15-20 minutes later the PSEG shows up and reads his gas detector and tells me to
get the fuck out of there.
in the Attic
I kept thinking of that guy in I
think Staten Island who about 15 years ago had his
house blow up and sex toys flew all over the place. The
PSEG guy said I was lucky it was summer because otherwise the boiler coming on would've sparked a BIG explosion.
As it was, I
had moved the stove across the concrete cellar
floor, I could've sparked that, or even turning on a
light, a little short, and KABOOM.
tell the guy who almost blew up his house that I did blow up my
house. I have a disorder which prevents me from sniffing odors, and
there was a gas leak. I needed to do some light soddering under the
bathroom sink and sparked the gas. The bathtub miraculously landing
on top of me prevented me from being crushed under the debris.
Fortunately I had good insurance. I now live in a warm climate
year-round and leave the windows open.
In fact when I had first gone
into the basement with the gas guy, I turned on a light and he almost hit me. He wouldn't clear anyone to go into the house for
an hour afterwards, even with the windows opened,
his detector was still reading, "It'll
Blow." I was shitting my pants, and needless to say when the crisis passed, I got hammered like you wouldn't believe. I kept
thinking of the flame that would've been shooting
out of that pipe; how fierce it would've been if it
ignited. Never mind that it would've been blowtorching a pile of matchstick
Every time I think of the
consequences of what would've happened if that house
blew up, I get a very sick feeling in my stomach. The house wasn't
even insured! I was in the process of transferring ownership. No one would've had anywhere to live! Whenever I think I'm not
catching a break in life, I think how close I came
to blowing that fucking house into splinters and
what a break that was.
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