Movies   

 

 

Cheaper by the Dozen

vs

Cold Mountain

December 29, 2003 -- There are commercials now on Disney channel that say Hillary Duff is now an international recording artist superstar.

Last time I saw her, she was lip-synching her lyrics on the AMA awards, strutting around the stage like a poor-man's version of Britney Spears. She was out-and-out Bland with a capital B in the movie "Cheaper by the Dozen". Her acting was stiff and forced. I got the feeling Steve Martin was humoring her, rolling his eyes in his mind when acting scenes with her. 

...If I had to choose between (or amongst) being on a desert island with Liz Smith, Cindy Adams, Phil Mushnick, or Peter Vecsey -- the four columnists I love to hate in the NY Post, I'd choose ...

 

Piper Perabo was the young actress you couldn't wait to see on screen in this movie. Ashton Kutcher was great too. Steve Martin was ok, and overall the movie was another cheap Disney-type knockoff. Funny in parts, but overall very forgettable. One-dimensional characters; a story with lots of holes. Ebert and Roeper gave it two thumbs up, which shows you what a thumb's up from those guys means these days. Poor Siskel.

PS: 9-year-old's love this movie. But they love everything except Civil War documentaries on the History channel..

 

Versus "Cold Mountain"

 

Haven't seen Cold Mountain yet, but already I can tell you I love this movie. Why? Because Liz Smith, syndicated gossip columnist, went to see the premier the other night in NY, and the people at the door didn't know who she was. She had to -- wait in line like all of us other schmucks. And she was indeed so pissed off about this that she devoted the first paragraph of her column the other day to it.

 

Then she goes out of her way to rip the movie, which shows you how huge her ego must be.

If I had to choose between (or amongst) being on a desert island with Liz Smith, Cindy Adams, Phil Mushnick, or Peter Vecsey -- the four columnists I love to hate in the NY Post, I'd choose -- Peter Vecsey, because at least we could talk basketball.

 

Hold on, nix that. If I had to spend 4 years on a deserted island with someone, I wouldn't choose a guy. I'd choose... Cindy Adams. Even though she's banal and egotistical, she has a bit of an inadvertant sense of humor sometimes. I love when she starts talking politics in her column, letting us in on the "inside dirt" of what's really going on in the world, stuff someone whispered to her at some Washington DC party. As if someone with authority would let Cindy Adams in on the secrets of the free or unfree world. People must love to yank her chain. She ends her column with "only in NY, kids, only in NY". I want to smack her in the head when I read that. As a NY-born person.

 

-- LouV